Fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time

Maryknoll Lay Missioner Louise Locke reflects on encountering Jesus in the poor and vulnerable.

“If we recognize [Jesus] under the appearance of bread, we will have no difficulty recognizing him in the disguise of the suffering poor”. — Saint Teresa of Calcutta

In my 5^th year as a Maryknoll Lay Missioner missioned to Bolivia, I reflect that I have had plenty of opportunities to accompany the poorest Bolivians.  I have assisted abandoned elders living in a nursing home and men living with disabilities.  Right now, I am co-founding a ministry to help the poorest and most vulnerable women and children receive psychological, emotional, educational, nutritional and spiritual assistance that will help them overcome many of the barriers preventing them from living full and enriching lives.  The plight of the people I accompany here touches me deeply and I view myself as an enlightened person who would never discriminate or want to avoid contact with those on the margins.  I tell myself that I really prefer the poor as they are the ones most loved and blessed by the Lord as described in today’s readings.

And then I met my reality check. 

As a practicing Catholic who considers going to daily mass and receiving the Eucharist helpful in keeping my spirit sustained in my ministry efforts, I also feel drawn to participating in adoration at my local church.  There is a fairly affluent church near the Maryknoll Campus that offers adoration once a week after the daily mass and I have been participating in this weekly devotion for the last several years.  Recently, I had an experience in this church that profoundly humbled me and helped me realize I had to take another look at my own assumptions about the way I view God’s blessed poor. 

As I entered the church, I noticed a person sitting in one of the pews who seemed out of place.  He was a man of advanced years, disheveled and filthy from head to toe with dirt-blackened feet encased in open-toed indigenous-type sandals.  Lying next to him on the pew was a raggedy cloth bundle typically used by the indigenous to carry their possessions, wares to sell, or even their children.  I may not have focused on him except that he was staring at me very intently as I walked to my pew. 

I had never seen this man before and, rather than concentrating on the mass, I found myself totally distracted by this man’s presence.  My mind was completely absorbed in calculating and judging.  I had thoughts like “Why is he staring at me-it makes me uncomfortable.” “He is going to ask me for money – should I give him some?”  “How much?” “Will he come back every week if I give him money today?”  “Why is he in this church-he is interrupting my prayer time with the Lord!”

As the mass finished and gave way to adoration, I thought – “okay, he will get tired of sitting there and leave when he realizes that we aren’t finished”.  I very much wanted to avoid encountering him as I left the church so I wouldn’t have to worry about his motives and whether or not to give him money. 

As the monstrance was placed on the altar and adoration began, I still felt the man’s presence and his penetrating stare.  Looking at the Eucharist encased in the monstrance and attempting to focus on adoring the Lord, the image of this man suddenly came to mind and out of nowhere I heard distinctly in my soul “Jesus is here, too”.   This happened several times until I finally understood what the Lord was trying to convey.

I was totally convicted with the realization that Jesus’s presence in the Eucharist cannot be separated and sterilized from Jesus’s presence in other people, especially God’s beloved poor.  The second reading particularly hits home to me with the words: “God chose the lowly and despised of the world, those who count for nothing, to reduce to nothing those who are something”.   Rather than love this man because of his dignity as a son of God, I judged, shunned and wanted to avoid him.  The realization that I am not as enlightened, nonjudgmental, and selfless as I think I am was a much-needed insight and I am profoundly humbled and grateful to God for this lesson.  Upon leaving the church that day, I greeted the man, asked his name and gave him some money.  Hopefully, the next time I encounter someone whose dignity may be hidden by outward appearances, I will be loving and compassionate toward them instead of judgmental.  I pray for the Lord’s help that it may be so.

O Source of Love and Fount of all Blessings:

Please help me to encounter you not only in worship but also in the foolish, weak, lowly and despised people you put in my path each day.  May I always be willing to accompany them without judgment.  May I constantly be reminded of my own need for repentance and conversion.  Amen.

Photo: Shadow of a person, available in the public domain via Unsplash.